Boyd Trotter is awesome. If there is one word that I could use to describe him it would be AWESOME! He has such an incredible heart and spirit. He loves God so much and has a passion for his will. He is loyal through all circumstances. Pain, hurt, tears, laughter, good times and hard times I know Boyd Trotter will always be there.
Boyd is my room mate and I wouldn't change that for the world. I am so grateful for him. His life has been such an encouragement for me. Boyd has Lyme disease which weakens his immune system making him prone to other diseases. Lyme has been a major reason why he had to give up gymnastics which was huge for him. Also his treatment has been very rigorous at times. I remember when he was taking these pills that pretty much made him allergic to the sun. Every time he would go out into the sun he would burn. I remember his hands got so burned that his skin was falling off and it looked miserable. He hung in there and got through the treatment.
It has been awesome to see how much Boyd has grown in the Lord this year. He has been devoted to his quiet times and has been developing a passion for God's people. He has really encouraged me to start considering a Summer Project. This Summer Boyd will be going to South Africa and to see him take such a leap of faith is really encouraging.
He has been through so much from injuries to illness, but in every situation he has persevered and endured. He has character and a heart that is admirable. He is loyal and steadfast in his relationship with God. I am so proud of him and so blessed to be a part of his life. I love him so much and I have been so encouraged by his love. I know that Boyd will always have my back and I can't wait to see what God is going to do in his life.
God, thank you so much for Boyd. Thank you for his heart and love. Thank you for his encouragement and loyalty. He has been an incredible friend and an awesome brother. He has challenged me in my quiet times and he has challenged me in my walk with you. He loves you so much and he is a light to the world. I pray that you will help him raise support so he can shine your light in South Africa. I pray that you will heal him from Lyme which has made his life a constant struggle. I pray that you will always be with him and guide him. He is awesome and I love him so much. Thank you for his friendship and thank you for his life!
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Saturday, January 15, 2011
The Desert
So many times I feel like I am in a desert. I feel like there is no one there for me. I feel like there is no one that cares. I feel like there is no hope and if I am honest I feel like there is no point to life.
The desert is a place of absolute starvation and thirst. I am longing for something to fill me up. I am longing for something to suffice my desires. I am longing for satisfaction.
It is in the desert where I am most vulnerable. In the desert I am prone to wander and chase after mirages. Mirages that include pictures of things that I think will satisfy like girls or sex or family or friends or approval or comfort and so on... I chase after these mirages to find emptiness. I went out of my way and I strayed from the path to go to these mirages, but when I arrive I only find more desert. When I arrive I become more lost and confused. I thought that this mirage off in the distance would satisfy my needs, but it was only a mirage. I thought that it was real. I thought that it would satisfy, but instead it left me empty. It is a fake illusion of satisfaction.
I am tired of chasing after mirages. I am tired of chasing after lovers that won't satisfy. I am in a desert and I am lost. I am confused and I do not know what to do. I am thirsty and hungry and I am longing to be satisfied.
It is in the desert that my faith is tested. It is in the desert where my true colors shine. It is in the desert where my true heart is revealed. My selfishness and sinful desires are evident and clear when God brings me through the desert. In the desert God reveals my brokeness and evilness. He shows me my sinful desires and reveals to me the brokeness inside of me. In the desert I realize how selfish I am. I realize how desperately I need God. I realize that nothing else will satisfy. It is in the desert tha God brings me back to him.
I am thankful for the desert. I am thankful for my thirst and hunger. I am thankful for my brokeness, because it reminds me of how Great my God is! It reminds me of how much He loves me. It reminds me of how He is enough to satisfy. It reminds me of His awesome Grace and unconditional Love. The desert is the place where God puts me, to show me how much He cares.
When I go through the desert God is very patient. He watches me stumble and fall apart. He sees my heartache and pain. Then at the perfect time God pours out His Love and Grace. He pours it out on me and bathes me in compassion. He kisses my parched lips and embraces my broken soul. He mends the scars and wounds. He suffices every need and every desire. He completes me.
God thank you for the desert! Thank you for every moment that reminds me of how awesome and glorious you are. I am walking through the desert. I am discouraged and broken. I do not know where to go, but I know you will call me at the perfect time. You will be there for me when I need you most. I am in the desert wandering around waiting for your voice. There are many temptations out there that I see. I see them and they look so appealing. I know that these mirages or temptations will not satisfy. I know that they are illusions and are fake. God I pray that you will lead me and that you will bring me into your sweet embrace soon. I do not know how much longer I can last, but God I pray that you will find me soon. I know that you are watching and I know that you can hear me and I know that you are with me and I know that you have a perfect plan. I love you and I trust you!
Matthew 11:28
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
Isaiah 55:1
"Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost."
Matthew 5:6
"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled."
Psalm 63:1
"A psalm of David. When he was in the Desert of Judah. O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water."
John 4:14
"but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life."
The desert is a place of absolute starvation and thirst. I am longing for something to fill me up. I am longing for something to suffice my desires. I am longing for satisfaction.
It is in the desert where I am most vulnerable. In the desert I am prone to wander and chase after mirages. Mirages that include pictures of things that I think will satisfy like girls or sex or family or friends or approval or comfort and so on... I chase after these mirages to find emptiness. I went out of my way and I strayed from the path to go to these mirages, but when I arrive I only find more desert. When I arrive I become more lost and confused. I thought that this mirage off in the distance would satisfy my needs, but it was only a mirage. I thought that it was real. I thought that it would satisfy, but instead it left me empty. It is a fake illusion of satisfaction.
I am tired of chasing after mirages. I am tired of chasing after lovers that won't satisfy. I am in a desert and I am lost. I am confused and I do not know what to do. I am thirsty and hungry and I am longing to be satisfied.
It is in the desert that my faith is tested. It is in the desert where my true colors shine. It is in the desert where my true heart is revealed. My selfishness and sinful desires are evident and clear when God brings me through the desert. In the desert God reveals my brokeness and evilness. He shows me my sinful desires and reveals to me the brokeness inside of me. In the desert I realize how selfish I am. I realize how desperately I need God. I realize that nothing else will satisfy. It is in the desert tha God brings me back to him.
I am thankful for the desert. I am thankful for my thirst and hunger. I am thankful for my brokeness, because it reminds me of how Great my God is! It reminds me of how much He loves me. It reminds me of how He is enough to satisfy. It reminds me of His awesome Grace and unconditional Love. The desert is the place where God puts me, to show me how much He cares.
When I go through the desert God is very patient. He watches me stumble and fall apart. He sees my heartache and pain. Then at the perfect time God pours out His Love and Grace. He pours it out on me and bathes me in compassion. He kisses my parched lips and embraces my broken soul. He mends the scars and wounds. He suffices every need and every desire. He completes me.
God thank you for the desert! Thank you for every moment that reminds me of how awesome and glorious you are. I am walking through the desert. I am discouraged and broken. I do not know where to go, but I know you will call me at the perfect time. You will be there for me when I need you most. I am in the desert wandering around waiting for your voice. There are many temptations out there that I see. I see them and they look so appealing. I know that these mirages or temptations will not satisfy. I know that they are illusions and are fake. God I pray that you will lead me and that you will bring me into your sweet embrace soon. I do not know how much longer I can last, but God I pray that you will find me soon. I know that you are watching and I know that you can hear me and I know that you are with me and I know that you have a perfect plan. I love you and I trust you!
Matthew 11:28
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
Isaiah 55:1
"Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost."
Matthew 5:6
"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled."
Psalm 63:1
"A psalm of David. When he was in the Desert of Judah. O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water."
John 4:14
"but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life."
Friday, January 14, 2011
Failure
I have the hardest time with failure. To me, failure is never an option. It is how I am wired. I never want to fail. I hate admitting that I am wrong. I hate admitting that I don't measure up. I hate everything that falls into the category of failure. I want to succeed.
When I fail or when I don't measure up or when I make a mistake or when I am wrong... I beat myself up. I tear myself up with condemning thoughts and words. I tell myself that I am worthless and undeserving. I meditate on the idea of being completely worthless. I lit it sit my heart and rot away all my joy. I bask in my short comings and drive myself crazy thinking about how I can be better.
I am always trying to improve myself. I am always trying to add on to my accomplishments. I am always trying and trying and trying, but in the end I always fail. Then I say to myself if I only try harder then maybe next time I will succeed. So I restart the cycle and try even harder, but end up failing even more.
This cycle tears me apart. It makes me feel so worthless. It makes me feel like dirt. It is a tool that Satan uses to rip me apart. When I fail I should rejoice. I should rejoice in the hope of my Savior. When I fail it should be a proclamation of God's Grace and it should shout the Glory of God. When I fail it should be a moment where I say, "Look at God! Look at what He has done! He has paid it all! His GRACE is ENOUGH to cover my sin!"
Instead I make it into a selfish moment. I turn into a moment of sulking and whining. I make it all about me and what I have done. I go to God as a defense lawyer and I bring my defense to his court. I give Him excuses and reasons. I tell Him that I didn't mean to fail, I didn't mean to mess up, I didn't mean to do that. I tell God that it will never happen again that I will be strong. I go to God to bring Him a case about my justification. I go to God not asking for His Grace, but telling Him that I will fix all my mistakes. I go to God in defense. A moment of failure is a moment of selfishness for me. A moment that should bring God Glory is a moment I use to draw attention on myself.
My failures should scream to all the world about God's Grace. When people hear about my failures, they should be hearing a story about God. A story about a broken man that God has graciously restored. They should not hear a story about a man that is trying to fix his brokenness, but a story about a man who God has redeemed. It should be a proclamation of God's awesome power and Grace. It should be a battle cry that shouts the name of the Lord to all the earth. When people hear my story they should only hear GRACE.
I surrender my pride. I surrender my stubbornness. I surrender my fake attitude. I surrender my insincerity. I surrender my brokenness. I surrender my success. I surrender my talent. I surrender my dreams. I surrender my life. I surrender my failures. God you can have my life. It is all yours and it was never mine to begin with. God you are the strength that gets me through everyday. You are the one that meets my every need. God please work through my sin, work through my pain, work through my success, and work through my failures. Shine in me in the darkest of times. Let all see my dirt and let all see your awesome GRACE. It is you that has saved my life. It is you that has redeemed me. I am so relieved to know that you did it perfect in my place and you paid it all in my place. Help me to experience your Gospel and Love everyday. I love you!
When I fail or when I don't measure up or when I make a mistake or when I am wrong... I beat myself up. I tear myself up with condemning thoughts and words. I tell myself that I am worthless and undeserving. I meditate on the idea of being completely worthless. I lit it sit my heart and rot away all my joy. I bask in my short comings and drive myself crazy thinking about how I can be better.
I am always trying to improve myself. I am always trying to add on to my accomplishments. I am always trying and trying and trying, but in the end I always fail. Then I say to myself if I only try harder then maybe next time I will succeed. So I restart the cycle and try even harder, but end up failing even more.
This cycle tears me apart. It makes me feel so worthless. It makes me feel like dirt. It is a tool that Satan uses to rip me apart. When I fail I should rejoice. I should rejoice in the hope of my Savior. When I fail it should be a proclamation of God's Grace and it should shout the Glory of God. When I fail it should be a moment where I say, "Look at God! Look at what He has done! He has paid it all! His GRACE is ENOUGH to cover my sin!"
Instead I make it into a selfish moment. I turn into a moment of sulking and whining. I make it all about me and what I have done. I go to God as a defense lawyer and I bring my defense to his court. I give Him excuses and reasons. I tell Him that I didn't mean to fail, I didn't mean to mess up, I didn't mean to do that. I tell God that it will never happen again that I will be strong. I go to God to bring Him a case about my justification. I go to God not asking for His Grace, but telling Him that I will fix all my mistakes. I go to God in defense. A moment of failure is a moment of selfishness for me. A moment that should bring God Glory is a moment I use to draw attention on myself.
My failures should scream to all the world about God's Grace. When people hear about my failures, they should be hearing a story about God. A story about a broken man that God has graciously restored. They should not hear a story about a man that is trying to fix his brokenness, but a story about a man who God has redeemed. It should be a proclamation of God's awesome power and Grace. It should be a battle cry that shouts the name of the Lord to all the earth. When people hear my story they should only hear GRACE.
I surrender my pride. I surrender my stubbornness. I surrender my fake attitude. I surrender my insincerity. I surrender my brokenness. I surrender my success. I surrender my talent. I surrender my dreams. I surrender my life. I surrender my failures. God you can have my life. It is all yours and it was never mine to begin with. God you are the strength that gets me through everyday. You are the one that meets my every need. God please work through my sin, work through my pain, work through my success, and work through my failures. Shine in me in the darkest of times. Let all see my dirt and let all see your awesome GRACE. It is you that has saved my life. It is you that has redeemed me. I am so relieved to know that you did it perfect in my place and you paid it all in my place. Help me to experience your Gospel and Love everyday. I love you!
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
A Shepherd and His Missing Lamb
PSALM 23
1 The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
3 he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
4 Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
6 Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.
There is a shepherd watching over his sheep. He senses that there is something wrong. He feels like there is something out of place. The shepherd counted his sheep and realized that one was missing. A lamb had gone astray. "We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all (Isaiah 53:6)."
The shepherd immediately left his flock to find his missing lamb. He left all of his sheep behind to find ONE lamb. He traveled far and long until he finally found his missing lamb. The shepherd broke the lamb's leg and carried it home on his shoulders. He cared and tended to the lamb until it recovered. The shepherd was filled with joy when he found his missing lamb, "...there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent (Luke 15:4-7)."
This a story about a shepherd who cared about his sheep. A shepherd that would let no lamb go astray. A shepherd that was willing to do whatever it takes to find its missing lamb. The shepherd broke the lamb out of love. Love that covers a multitudes of wrong. Love that covers the shame of a lamb that disobeyed. A lamb that thought it could do life on its own. A lamb that thought it could survive without the shepherd. Foolish lamb, the shepherd is the source of food, shelter and care. The shepherd is the wellspring of life. "Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them (John 7:37-38)."
In this story I play the role of the missing lamb. So many times I have thought that I had it all together. So many times I have thought that I could do it on my own. So many times I have thought that I could do it alone, but... I can't. Every time I find myself lost and alone. Every time I find myself wishing that I had never ran away. Then I feel the break. The bones crack. The pride shatters and my heart turns. I feel like a brick wall has slapped me every time. I feel paralyzed and confused, but in this chaos I feel myself being lifted onto the shoulders of my Shepherd. I feel God's loving hands mending my wounds and healing my heart. The pain is a reminder of the sin that I let invade my life. It is a reminder of my brokenness. I much rather be a limping lamb than a lost lamb. I will limp for the rest of my life if I have to as long as I can be with God; as long as I can be with my shepherd.
It is these moments in my life that I realize how much God loves me. It is these moments of brokenness and confusion where I surrender it all to God. It is these moments where I let down my pride and let Christ carry me home. It is these moments where God's Glory shines. It is these moments when people look at the horizon and see me on the shoulders of my great Savior. It is this that brings Glory to God. It is not about what I have done on my own, but it is all about what God has done in me. It is all about God's Glory shining through my weakness. "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28)."
God I give it up! "we(I) have sinned and done wrong. We(I) have been wicked and have rebelled; we(I) have turned away from your commands and laws (Daniel 9:5)." I have been on the run so long! Break my knees and bring me home! Break my pride and bring me home! I have nothing to hide. You have seen it all. You have seen the corruptness and you have seen the evilness, but Christ has satisfied. "But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed (Isaiah 53:5)." Bring me home! Bring me back into your arms. Nurse my wounds and heal the brokenness inside. Your love is so great and beautiful. Your love is true!
"For you were like sheep going astray, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls (1 Peter 2:25)."
I will live in the HOUSE of GOD FOREVER!
1 The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
3 he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
4 Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
6 Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.
There is a shepherd watching over his sheep. He senses that there is something wrong. He feels like there is something out of place. The shepherd counted his sheep and realized that one was missing. A lamb had gone astray. "We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all (Isaiah 53:6)."
The shepherd immediately left his flock to find his missing lamb. He left all of his sheep behind to find ONE lamb. He traveled far and long until he finally found his missing lamb. The shepherd broke the lamb's leg and carried it home on his shoulders. He cared and tended to the lamb until it recovered. The shepherd was filled with joy when he found his missing lamb, "...there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent (Luke 15:4-7)."
This a story about a shepherd who cared about his sheep. A shepherd that would let no lamb go astray. A shepherd that was willing to do whatever it takes to find its missing lamb. The shepherd broke the lamb out of love. Love that covers a multitudes of wrong. Love that covers the shame of a lamb that disobeyed. A lamb that thought it could do life on its own. A lamb that thought it could survive without the shepherd. Foolish lamb, the shepherd is the source of food, shelter and care. The shepherd is the wellspring of life. "Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them (John 7:37-38)."
In this story I play the role of the missing lamb. So many times I have thought that I had it all together. So many times I have thought that I could do it on my own. So many times I have thought that I could do it alone, but... I can't. Every time I find myself lost and alone. Every time I find myself wishing that I had never ran away. Then I feel the break. The bones crack. The pride shatters and my heart turns. I feel like a brick wall has slapped me every time. I feel paralyzed and confused, but in this chaos I feel myself being lifted onto the shoulders of my Shepherd. I feel God's loving hands mending my wounds and healing my heart. The pain is a reminder of the sin that I let invade my life. It is a reminder of my brokenness. I much rather be a limping lamb than a lost lamb. I will limp for the rest of my life if I have to as long as I can be with God; as long as I can be with my shepherd.
It is these moments in my life that I realize how much God loves me. It is these moments of brokenness and confusion where I surrender it all to God. It is these moments where I let down my pride and let Christ carry me home. It is these moments where God's Glory shines. It is these moments when people look at the horizon and see me on the shoulders of my great Savior. It is this that brings Glory to God. It is not about what I have done on my own, but it is all about what God has done in me. It is all about God's Glory shining through my weakness. "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28)."
God I give it up! "we(I) have sinned and done wrong. We(I) have been wicked and have rebelled; we(I) have turned away from your commands and laws (Daniel 9:5)." I have been on the run so long! Break my knees and bring me home! Break my pride and bring me home! I have nothing to hide. You have seen it all. You have seen the corruptness and you have seen the evilness, but Christ has satisfied. "But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed (Isaiah 53:5)." Bring me home! Bring me back into your arms. Nurse my wounds and heal the brokenness inside. Your love is so great and beautiful. Your love is true!
"For you were like sheep going astray, but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls (1 Peter 2:25)."
I will live in the HOUSE of GOD FOREVER!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Hosea
Hosea is a prophet. A prophet that obeyed and followed. A prophet that loved God so much. He preached to Israel. He told them about the wrath of God. He told them about the love of God. He told them to repent and run from their sins, but Israel refused. Israel was ignorant.
Gomer was a prostitute. She would leave at night and return the next day. She would bear children that were not Hosea's. She would leave Hosea for other men. Gomer was so lost and confused that she sold herself. She gave herself away to the hands of evil men.
Gomer and Hosea were destined to be. God called Hosea to marry Gomer, a woman that would hurt him more than anyone else. God called Hosea to marry someone that would give herself away. She sold herself into slavery. She pursued lovers that would never satisfy. God called Hosea to marry a woman that did not love him. God called Hosea and Hosea listened.
I can only imagine the pain Hosea felt every night. The pain of hearing his lover sneak out into the streets. The pain of knowing that she was sleeping around. The pain of looking at children that were not his. Children that were conceived out of prostitution. The pain of watching the one you love the most throw their life away. The pain of a broken heart.
Gomer! What were you thinking! How could you abandon someone who loved you no matter what? How could you turn your back on someone who loved you through all your mess? How could you? How could you? Did you not know how much he loved you?
God! Why would you call Hosea and destine him for such a painful fate? Why would you call him to love someone who did not love him back? Why would you do that to your servant? Why? He loved you so much!
Glory shown through the streets of Israel on that dark night. The night when Gomer the prostitute was being sold. She was standing naked and vulnerable in front of the crowd. She was on display for all to see and she was being sold to the highest bidder. She was cold and lonely. She was abandoned and forgotten. She had given herself away to so many men that there was no other way to go than into slavery. She had gone too far and had been away too long to come back home. She had no other hope than to be another man's prostitute. She knew that she had thrown everything away. She knew that all hope was lost, but amongst the crowd she could hear a voice. She recognized the voice, but could not remember whose it was. She listened and heard herself sold away to the man that paid, "15 shekels of silver and about a homer and a lethek of barley (Hosea 3:2)." The man took her into his arms and told her, "You are to live with me many days; you must not be a prostitute or be intimate with any man, and I will live with you (Hosea 3:3)." Then she realized that she was safe. She was in the arms of her lover. She had been saved. Hosea had came for her and paid a price for her. He came to love her. He came to save her.
The words that Hosea said to Gomer must of sounded so sweet. Gomer must have felt so relieved to hear the comforting words of her husband. How grateful she must of felt to know that he came for her and found her. How overwhelmed with love she must of felt when she knew that he gave it all for her. He rescued her from evil and brought her home. She was safe and she knew that she was loved.
The unconditional love of Hosea is God's unconditional love for me. I am Gomer! I am the prostitute! I am the one who sneaks out at night and gives myself away to lovers that never satisfy! I am the one that has no hope! I am the one that forgot the love of my lover! I am the one that went too far to bother coming back, but thank goodness God found me on the street! Praise God for coming for me! Praise God for the son he sent to buy me! Praise God for love that is unconditional! Praise God!
I was bought for a price. I was bought with a single, pure and holy life. The one God loved the most gave himself up so that I may be loved. So that I may experience Grace. The blood of Christ is the greatest gift I could ever have. Oh how my God loves me! He loves me! He loves me! He loves me when I run away! He loves me when I make a mess! He loves me when I sing His praise! He loves me when I cry! He loves me even when I give myself away to other lovers! He loves me!
This story is a reminder of how much God has loved me. A reminder of his unconditional love that I so often take for granted. Also this story calls me to go out and love others. To go out and love people like Hosea loved Gomer. God loves me so much, but yet I love no one. I keep it all to myself and there are millions of people that have never experienced what I have felt. So this story is a story that has changed my life.
God I pray that you will change my heart towards people. God I pray that you will remind me every day of your unconditional love so that I may share it with others. God thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I love you!
Gomer was a prostitute. She would leave at night and return the next day. She would bear children that were not Hosea's. She would leave Hosea for other men. Gomer was so lost and confused that she sold herself. She gave herself away to the hands of evil men.
Gomer and Hosea were destined to be. God called Hosea to marry Gomer, a woman that would hurt him more than anyone else. God called Hosea to marry someone that would give herself away. She sold herself into slavery. She pursued lovers that would never satisfy. God called Hosea to marry a woman that did not love him. God called Hosea and Hosea listened.
I can only imagine the pain Hosea felt every night. The pain of hearing his lover sneak out into the streets. The pain of knowing that she was sleeping around. The pain of looking at children that were not his. Children that were conceived out of prostitution. The pain of watching the one you love the most throw their life away. The pain of a broken heart.
Gomer! What were you thinking! How could you abandon someone who loved you no matter what? How could you turn your back on someone who loved you through all your mess? How could you? How could you? Did you not know how much he loved you?
God! Why would you call Hosea and destine him for such a painful fate? Why would you call him to love someone who did not love him back? Why would you do that to your servant? Why? He loved you so much!
Glory shown through the streets of Israel on that dark night. The night when Gomer the prostitute was being sold. She was standing naked and vulnerable in front of the crowd. She was on display for all to see and she was being sold to the highest bidder. She was cold and lonely. She was abandoned and forgotten. She had given herself away to so many men that there was no other way to go than into slavery. She had gone too far and had been away too long to come back home. She had no other hope than to be another man's prostitute. She knew that she had thrown everything away. She knew that all hope was lost, but amongst the crowd she could hear a voice. She recognized the voice, but could not remember whose it was. She listened and heard herself sold away to the man that paid, "15 shekels of silver and about a homer and a lethek of barley (Hosea 3:2)." The man took her into his arms and told her, "You are to live with me many days; you must not be a prostitute or be intimate with any man, and I will live with you (Hosea 3:3)." Then she realized that she was safe. She was in the arms of her lover. She had been saved. Hosea had came for her and paid a price for her. He came to love her. He came to save her.
The words that Hosea said to Gomer must of sounded so sweet. Gomer must have felt so relieved to hear the comforting words of her husband. How grateful she must of felt to know that he came for her and found her. How overwhelmed with love she must of felt when she knew that he gave it all for her. He rescued her from evil and brought her home. She was safe and she knew that she was loved.
The unconditional love of Hosea is God's unconditional love for me. I am Gomer! I am the prostitute! I am the one who sneaks out at night and gives myself away to lovers that never satisfy! I am the one that has no hope! I am the one that forgot the love of my lover! I am the one that went too far to bother coming back, but thank goodness God found me on the street! Praise God for coming for me! Praise God for the son he sent to buy me! Praise God for love that is unconditional! Praise God!
I was bought for a price. I was bought with a single, pure and holy life. The one God loved the most gave himself up so that I may be loved. So that I may experience Grace. The blood of Christ is the greatest gift I could ever have. Oh how my God loves me! He loves me! He loves me! He loves me when I run away! He loves me when I make a mess! He loves me when I sing His praise! He loves me when I cry! He loves me even when I give myself away to other lovers! He loves me!
This story is a reminder of how much God has loved me. A reminder of his unconditional love that I so often take for granted. Also this story calls me to go out and love others. To go out and love people like Hosea loved Gomer. God loves me so much, but yet I love no one. I keep it all to myself and there are millions of people that have never experienced what I have felt. So this story is a story that has changed my life.
God I pray that you will change my heart towards people. God I pray that you will remind me every day of your unconditional love so that I may share it with others. God thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I love you!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)