Master Me

If you can understand it then you can master it...

Any scientist would agree that the purpose of research and studying is to better understand the subject at hand in order to predict it or in other words master it. For instance, a scientist studies the properties of electricity to learn how it functions and once this is accomplished electricity can be utilized. Scientist discovered ways to use electricity to power homes, automobiles, airplanes and computers. The point is that in order to master something you need to understand it and then you can utilize it.

Like any good tool you need to know how it works. A hammer can't be used by someone who does not know how to use it. The user must understand the function of the hammer in order to unleash its full potential. A hammer should not be used as a toothbrush or a hairbrush, but definitely should be utilized as a tool that smashes nails. The tool is surrendered to the will of the master and the master can't use the tool for anything other than its purpose. When the tool is mastered it is at its highest potential and it is serving its greatest purpose.

Take a step back and look at the way you learn about God. Look with honest eyes into the depths of your heart and think about the way you study the word, listen to preachers and worship in church. Think about the reasoning behind your actions and think about the frustration you feel when you just don't understand God. Think about the times that have been difficult and reflect on your feelings towards God. Think about the days where this whole God thing just doesn't make sense. Think about the moments where you have questioned God's existence, because you don't see Him, hear Him and feel Him. Think.

I am convicted with the desire to use God like a tool. I have tried to learn about Him and study Him and understand Him. I tried to at least know enough about God was to master Him and control Him. My equation was this that if I read my Bible everyday, prayed everyday, worshipped everyday and shared my Faith everyday then I would have a great life with a lot of money, kids and security. I tried to follow this outline in order to receive the results. Nothing in my heart wanted to read, pray, worship and share. It was all a show in order to use God like a tool for my own good.

I am in no way saying that reading your Bible, praying, worshipping and sharing your Faith is bad. Actually, I believe that these are outward signs of a changed life IN Christ, but it is all a sham if these things are done not IN Christ. The truth about my walk with God was that it revolved around me. I would get so frustrated at Him if I didn't understand something and I would be so upset that I couldn't comprehend Him. I wanted to know everything about Him, but not for the purposes of falling in love with Him, but for the purposes of using Him. The crazy thing is that I thought and believed in my deepest of hearts that I was seeking God, but really I was seeking my own selfish desires. I was so blinded by my own deceit and evil heart that I was living a Christ like life without Christ. I wanted to learn enough about Him to develope a code or equation for success. I wanted to use Him to have a happier life and the reasons for my pursuit was to bring my name glory rather than His. I was a fake. I wanted to master God to control Him. This is an evil reason for pursuing God.

The truth is that I am scared. I am afraid of not knowing, not understanding, and not ever knowing the answers. I want to know why this happens and that happens and I want to know the reason for this and that, but I don't. It drives me crazy to think of all the mysteries of God and how much I don't know. Why God would you allow sin? Why God would you create a tree that we could eat from that would curse us? Why does Satan exist? Why have you not destroyed him already? Why are there people born every day that will never know your name? Why not just let them never be born if they are destined for condemnation? Why predestination or why free will? Why baptism and why this or that!? Why!?

One can go mad thinking about all that is unknown about God. Trust me I know. It is indescibeable of how great our God is and how He is incomprehendable. We will never be able to wrap our minds around the vast concept of God and therefore we will never understand Him and never be able to master Him. Now this is the truth and this is what overwhelms me, because God calls me to surrender my life to Him who I don't even understand. He calls me to be the tool and says, "I will be your master!" The problem is that I want to be the master and I want Him to be the tool, but this will never happen because I am no god.

So I give up... I have pursued for the wrong reasons. I have sought after Him for the wrong purpose. Now instead of being overwhelmed by God's mystery I am going to rest in His mystery. Even though it scares me I will have Faith. I will trust in the ONE who no one can comprehend and in the ONE who knows me better than myself. He is my ultimate master. I will lose myself in His mystery. I will pursue Him with the purpose of desiring to fall in love with the ONE who gave His son for me. My pursuit is a reaction to the action taken on the Cross. I would never of known God if it were not for Christ. So my hope is in Him who gives me strength and in Him who is a great mystery.

But who are you, O man, to talk back to God? "Shall what is formed say to him who formed it, 'Why did you make me like this?'" -Romans 9:20

When the tool is mastered it is at its highest potential and it is serving its greatest purpose. MASTER ME!